Jokes

[jrrdw]

Bunch of perverts! By the way, after reading the statue joke, i'm just way way perverted. I was thinking of the positions they where trying after standing there for all those years! SICK PUPIES!!!!

[alex bennett]

Two guys are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then one guy turns to the other and hands him a bill. "Here’s that $100 I owe you," he says. got that one from http://www.innocentenglish.com/funny-jokes.html

This next one is hmm kinda racist, and yes pimpmann Sexual Connotations are included. Belive it or not, my Economic's Teacher told us this....
So this guy walks into a adult shop asks the clerk for a blow up doll, the clerks asks male or female, guy says female, clerks says white or black, guy says white, clerk asks christian or muslim, guy asks whats the difference? the clerk says well the muslims blow themselves up.

[CS]

Whats good about a emo pizza?

It cuts itself!

[sgort87]

I wish my grass was emo...

Damn that blow-up doll thing was great!

[Benny]

lol, the muslims blow them selves up, that was great.

[saladtossser]

that was hilarious

[schmanman]

these are some dumb ones I came up with


what is michal jacksons favorite show?

A: trading faces



What do you call a suicidal comedian?


A: a comic-kaze


get it ! instead of "kamakaze" it's comic-kaze!

[saladtossser]

What do Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?

A: They are both made of plastic, and kids turn them on

[jrrdw]

Salad, Salad, Salad, cracken on mj is 1 thing but you had to drag the kidds into it, um, um ,um. Whats the smileing cats name, Chestershire?

[CS]

What does McDonalds and Micheal Jackson have in common?

A: They both stick 40 year old meat in 8 year old buns

What does Micheal Jackson like about twenty-six year olds?

A: There is twenty of them

[saladtossser]

So the king of this kindom has a problem
his beautiful daughter cannot get married
because her cursed hands will melt anything they touch
one day, a witch tells the king, the only way to get rid of the curse, is to find something solid that can not melt in her hands
so the king holds a contest
who ever can find an solid object that will not melt, wins his daughter
the first man brings a block of really hard steel, but it melted
the second man brings a block of pure tungsten, but it melted
the third man tells her to reach in his pant pockets, she held the object with in, she blushes for a minute, it did not melt
the man grins as the curse is gone and he wins the princess

what object were you thinking about?? you sicko
a: they were M&Ms, they only melt in your mouth

[schmanman]

a m&m. they melt in your mouth,not your hands !!!

[jrrdw]

Yea, that proves it, i'm a sicko!!

[schmanman]

oh here's a couple more I came up with.


how do chineese chef's get from place to place?


A: they wok.




what do you get when you cross 80's rock and roll and religion??


A: kiss-tianity

(like christianity)

[alex bennett]

so this lady is looking for a boyfriend so she places an ad in the newspaper, she puts, looking for man that will not beat me, will not run away from me, and is good in bed. So after a few weeks she hears her doorbell and she goes to her door to find a man in a wheel chair with no legs nor arms, she says how may i help you? He replies im here about the ad, look i have no arms I cannot beat you, I have no legs, i cannot run from you. she asks well what about in bed? and he says, How do you think i rang the door bell?

What did the mom say to MJ at the beach?

A: Hey! get outta my sun.